[phonetic dictionary] second offerings

The idea is that this is only a phonetic dictionary and so the definitions do not actually accord with the meaning of the words but with the parts of the words, as sounded.

So, take "antelope", definition "absconding insect". "Ant" - the little insect. "Elope" - to run away with one's lover.

Similarly, with "badinage" - the phonetic meaning comes out as "bad in age" - memory, sex, teeth.

If you get the idea, try these below:

The first offerings were here.

Here are the second:

3 Adenoid..................Irritated by adverts

4 Alimony..................Arab coins

7 Aphrodisiac............Trapeze artists from Zaire

9 Barbecue................Awaiting haircut

12 Capsize................Seven and three-quarters

13 Carrion......................Continue

14 Castanet....................Go fishing

15 Chinchilla...................Aftershave

17 Counter-culture.........Retailing

19 Emulate.....................Dead bird

Can you state, in each case, why that particular phonetic meaning?

[thought for the day] friday evening

There's only one way to find out if a man is honest...ask him.

If he says 'yes,' you know he's a crook.

[Groucho]

[making eyes] to look or not to look, that is ...

Was having a little "discussion" with a sweet girl this morning [hesitate to call it an "argument'] and she was saying how she hated how men always make eyes, the arrogant bstds [last three words my addition].

I countered by saying that that was rich and recounted an incident three evenings ago when I was in the cafe and a guy and his girl came in. She positioned herself where she could check out the cafe and while he was forking some spaghetti into his mouth, the first cross-room shot was fired.

I naturally returned it and it might have continued except that that chap could have been me, poor sod.

My fellow discussee pointed out that this made me as bad as all the others, at which point I said hmmm, well I don't look at them - they look at me.

She asked how I knew they were looking at me if I hadn't been looking to see if they were looking at me? And why would they be looking at me anyway? I replied that it might be my white scarf and balding pate.

At that point, fortuitously, the car arrived and I got away.

On reflection in the car, I was sure I didn't make eyes at girls but definitely know when they look at me, at which point I usually look back. How would I know? Well it's easy to see movement through 180 degrees or more - surely you can do that too? So a face turned towards you would be obvious, even if you weren't looking.

No matter.

I decided this evening to put it to some controlled tests, involving walking to the Pyramid and trying various moves along the way.

1. First was to see how it normally worked and I was going to scrutinize and analyse everything. The controlling premise was that it had to be a girl with a bf.

All right, along came the first and an interesting thing happened.

At about ten metres, he was oblivious but she had already seen what was coming. It might have been my white scarf, it might have been my balding pate. Either way, within two metres, all three making moves to step aside to pass, he, being closest to me and taller, never got to see what she was doing.

She initially dropped the chin and eyes but then, at one metre, the look was shot across, her face half hidden by the bf's arm. I suddenly looked and she looked away quickly but as we passed, the 2nd look came from the side.

He was still oblivious to the whole thing.

2. This time I showed absolutely no interest [but don't forget the 180 degree vision]. I stared straight ahead and let them pass and there was the dropped head half hidden behind the bf and one quick look but then she ceased looking.

3. The third was a slap in the face for me as she showed not the least interest and resolutely looked ahead, gripping the bf's arm.

4. The fourth was like the first except that, instead of returning her look, I let a slight grin play on my lips. She didn't give me a second look.

5. The fifth was more dangerous as I telegraphed the move early and glanced in full view of the bf. He began his predictable body language, she dropped her head and then shot the look but he looked at her and she covered it well. Phew. Then again, he'd clearly summed up that the opposition wasn't much and didn't bother with me as we passed.

6. The sixth was at the traffic lights - they were across the road. I didn't look once. She looked the whole time, even as we passed. It might have been my white pate or balding scarf.

7. I never tried where I'd make eyes at her [wanting to keep the high moral ground with my afrementioned discussee] but I surmise the gf would have looked straight ahead and ignored this sleazy jerk.

So what did it prove?

That everyone at least notices what goes on around, that the second or continued look is really the only one you could take issue with, that you get more looks if you don't seem to look and maybe that men should be more aware of their gf's relative position next time they go for a walk with her.

Also - never make eyes at a girl with a large bf.

[tales from the regions] more of the same

H/T Wonko:

A regional "senate" of local council leaders could oversee Advantage West Midlands spending, under plans unveiled by the Government.

The region’s top local government figures, including the leaders of councils such as Birmingham, Wolverhampton, Coventry, Dudley, Walsall and Sandwell, will meet together to oversee spending of more than £300 million.

Am I out of order seeing this scramble for the Eurodollar as obscene? And while we're loosely on the topic of local decisions - how about the new eco-towns on green areas, brought to our attention by Englisch Fyrd:

Mr Shapps said the Conservatives would "always back plans for sustainable eco-communities. But I'm afraid there are several on this list which will cause immediate concern to local people because they're being built on green fields," he added.

... along with the loss of part of Norfolk Broads?

Ron Whitehead of the Flood Protection Association, an industry body, said: "I know of developers who get approval and do as little as possible to comply. There needs to be a performance specification for flood defence - if you have the possibility of this type of flooding you have the following measures.

"Unless the Government closes the loophole, developers will continue to get away with it. If there were building standards, developers would have to take account of flood risk when properties were refurbished, too."

Great to see that planning for what was once England is in such good, selfless hands.

[phonetic dictionary] first offerings

Long, long ago I tried this with readers but it went down like a lead balloon. Think I'll try again. If it's popular, there are plenty more of them waiting to post.

The idea is that it is a phonetic dictionary and so the definitions do not accord with the meanng of the words but with the parts of the words, as sounded. Try these:

6 Antelope................Absconding insect

8 Badinage................Memory, sex, teeth

11 Canteloupe...........Chaperoned

13 Carrion......................Continue

16 Condescending..........Greek Paratrooper

18.Divest........................Princess's garment

23 Felonious..................Monk

36 Ideal..........................You shuffle

63 Scintillate..................Nocturnal orgy

68 Surcingle...................Unmarried baronet

One reader has just asked about this post and so I'd best take one of them and dissect it. Antelope - OK, it's an animal. But ant [the pictured insect] ... and he elopes with his girlfriend ... well, the image tickles the fancy. Same with "sin till late". [Chuckle - well I like them anyway.]

[[raf birthday] it took an american to remember it

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