[crunch time] cat toying with mice

Which one are we?

I tell you it's induced, I've spelt out the agenda in many posts and I state further that this is a trial run just now. Who baled the banks out this time?

A credit crunch has been averted with the help of world banking 'super-friends', but stock-watchers are divided on the wash-up.

And this:

The Fed promised to provide whatever funding was needed to ensure that banks were able to continue lending to each other at its desired interest rate of 5.25 per cent and pumped $38bn (£18.8bn) into the system in three separate open market operations.

And this.

Yet at the October 25th FOMC it was noted that:

The President recently signed the Financial Services Regulatory Relief Act of 2006, which gave the Federal Reserve discretion, beginning October 2011, both to pay interest on reserve balances and to reduce further or eliminate reserve requirements.

And this:

This amounts to the most extensive liquidity support operation undertaken by the US central bank since the 9/11 terrorist attacks and follows similar steps by the European Central Bank and Japanese central bank in the past two days. Among the main central banks, only the Bank of England has declined to inject extra cash into the markets.

In layman's terms, the problems are soft GDP, rampant consumer debt, sluggish housing market and inflation. Even a non-economist can draw conclusions from that.

Now, add to that the factor of China [hat tip Wolfie]:

The Chinese government has begun a concerted campaign of economic threats against the United States, hinting that it may liquidate its vast holding of US treasuries if Washington imposes trade sanctions to force a yuan revaluation.

Add to that the suicidal consumerism in recent decades, the drop in the real value of the monetary unit against key commodities and the tightening of government control of all aspects of people's lives to an unprecedented peacetime level plus the European "feelers" from Merkel on gearing-up for war and the surreptitious pushing through of the Euro treaty and what have we got?

Above all else, whilst you consider this, also consider who is actually at the helm. Which men and women are actually running the economy? Do you trust a CFR or European financier to act in your best interests, come the credit crunch?

There are therefore a series of recommendations, all but one posted here before:

1] Quietly get out of any credit arrangement within the next two years or any other mechanism where you are in thrall to a financial body;

2] Take legal advice on the status of your private property and ensure the title is secure in your name;

3] In the case of a mortgage, be prepared to have the balance called in by 2012, i.e. be prepared to concede the loss of your property when the 2nd Fed induced crash comes;

4] Therefore have some fallback living facility somewhere, even if it's only a beach house with a garden.

5] "You've got to have cash," says Roger Montgomery, managing director of Clime Asset Management.

[blogfocus saturday] know thy pet

Otherwise known as the Great Pet Quiz. Your task - to match the "posts and pics" [which do go together] with the personage listed below. Those with eight right win three bags of chaff.

1 Holly can't understand why Harvey is apparently standing, staring into space; she doesn't realise he's adapting my 'I'm just admiring the scenery' approach when I stop, panting, halfway up a hill. And this evening he ate some fish skin and a bit of dog food - hand-fed by me. One is born every minute.

2 Simi has had the first of her summer haircuts today and is very pleased with herself. She got lots of treats afterwards for having proved herself to be "educata" [well brought-up] at the doggie grooming parlour!

3 I had posted this in the past but thought I`d throw it up again for a laugh. I had this doilie on my computer chair and there must have been a crumb of food there because next time I turned my head, there was Elvis wearing the doilie!! LOL He stayed that way long enough for me to grab the camera near by.

4 Tiny "circling the herd" on Sunday as diners played defense with their lobsters, clams and mussels during the Down East Clambake at Goomp's

We're posting a cute kitty pic because we didn't want to leave that somewhat unnerving image of the Shellfish McToast at the top of our blog overnight.

5 The RSPCA had sent him there after they had made five unsuccessful attempts to find him a permanent home. It is a little known fact that the RSPCA do kill dogs they are unable to re-home, unlike the National Canine Defence League. But they give them a last chance – before the final deed is done. So he was on doggy death row and staging 24 hour barking and dirty protests.

6 As you know, I am the proud owner of a wonderful Jack Russell, called Gio. I am pleased to say he has never behaved quite as badly as Bert, a Jack Russell owned by Tory MP Andrew Turner. Bert took it upon himself to embarrass his owner while visiting the Isle of Wight Show when he savaged a Polecat to death.

7 The grey mare and I have just celebrated our fifth anniversary together. As far as relationships go, I think it’s very satisfactory: she carries me on her back, and I feed, worship and adore her. Prior to the grey mare, I had acquired my horses: she is the first one I paid for. Hunting for a horse can be a harrowing business.

8 OK, no. They aren't champs. They have various "not quite perfect" traits. But I love 'em. To bits. And not for the world would I hold their tails out, raise their heads unnaturally or flick at them with a brush like a demented game show contestant (not in public anyway).

And the personages for this evening are:

Iain Dale, Tea & Margaritas, Mopsa, Liz, Mutley, Welshcakes, Sisu, Mutterings and Meanderings.

[smallmindedness] petty bureaucrats strike again

Arch-criminal June Turnbull [79] hard at work flouting the law

Excuse me whilst I pause for a few moments and collect myself, regain a little self-control, you understand. All right, I'm ready now.

Regulars know that I often blog on the macro-crims in the fetid recesses of Britain, Europe and America but I don't get upset about them. It's just a job warning everyone what el creepos are up to.

What does upset me though and upsets me greatly are the jobsworths, the petty bureaucrats, the mealy-mouthed pedants, the regulation spouters and the like. In other words, the pedants who run Urchfont in Wiltshire, whom the Lone Voice [Newport City] deals with at his blog.

In a nutshell, June Turnbull, 79, has been working on a public flowerbed in her village every year for no remuneration and she pays for the flowers and compost out of her pension [hundreds of pounds so far].

Suddenly, recently, a highway inspector "caught" her doing it, reported her to the Wiltshire County Council who have now "ordered her to carry three metal signs, post a lookout and wear a fluorescent safety jacket".

She says:

"I come and work on the flowerbed at the drop of a hat when the weather is fine and I have some time to spare. I can't drag around three great metal signs and have someone standing by in case I might want to do a bit of work on it.

I work there until the gardening is done. I love doing it. It is my bit to keep the village tidy. It is a lovely little village. I don't care what they do to me. I will continue working on the flowerbed."

The council has retaliated by ordering her to:

"stay away from the flowers until she complies with their safety regulations."

Mrs. Turnbull has replied:

"They can send me to jail if they like. I just want to be left alone to do it. It is a very pretty flowerbed. I have tried to make it look very natural."

Residents credit her with "transforming the flowerbed into a gorgeous focal point, which helped Urchfont win the title of Best Kept Village in Wiltshire two years ago" and to be fair, Parish Council Chairman Peter Newell thinks the County has gone over the top on this.

The mental deficient who ordered this thing, Peter Hanson, divisional highways manager for the county council, has insisted:

she has no "Section 96" safety licence and thus must cease work for her own "public health and safety".

Can anyone tell me if public lynchings are illegal these days? More seriously, is there any "recall" mechanism in local government procedures which could be invoked to rid society of this sort of moron?

You can hear the defence now:

"If we start making exceptions, yes even for this old lady, where would we all be, eh? Law and order would break down before we knew it."

Rustic Urchfont, hotbed of septuagenarian crime

The Lone Voice concludes:

Hurrah for the endless sheets of paper that need to be filled in before anyone can to do anything in this nation, hurrah for the many countless and pointless bans, rules, red tape and assorted bull shit that now make up this merry isle.

[status] patrician or pleb?

"You have no business to take our books; you are a dependent, mamma says; you have no money; your father left you none; you ought to beg and not live here with gentleman's children like us and eat the same meals as we do and wear clothes at our mamma's expense." [Jane Eyre]

So what's your immediate reaction? That the young lady is right and that the obnoxious teacher has been rightly put in his place or that what the obnoxious little madam needs is a good, sound spanking?

What confers status?

1 age and seniority, as in the case of this teacher;

2 specialized knowledge, like the senior mechanic who services your car;

3 job, as in the teacher and gentleman's daughter;

4 birth;

5 money;

6 intelligence and general ability;

7 what else?

Python always seem to have something pertinent to say on social issues so here's their take. Two pepperpots are sitting on a sofa, looking through an album of baby photos:

Mrs Nigger-Baiter Oh, yes, he's such a clever little boy, just like his father.

Mrs S D'you think so, Mrs Nigger-Baiter?

Mrs Nigger-Baiter Oh yes, spitting image.

[The door opens. The son comes in.]

Son Good afternoon, mother. Good afternoon, Mrs Nigger-Baiter.

Mrs Nigger-Baiter Ooh, he's walking already!

Mrs S Yes, he's such a clever little boy, aren't you? Coochy coochy coo ...

Mrs Nigger-Baiter Hello, coochy, coochy, coochy coo...

Mrs S He...llo, he...llo... (they tickle him under the chin)

Mrs Nigger-Baiter Oochy coochy. (the son smiles a little tight smile) Look at him laughing... ooh, he's a chirpy little fellow. Isn't he a chirpy little fellow ... eh? eh? Does he talk Does he talk, eh?

Son Yes, of course I talk, I'm Minister for Overseas Development.

This status question was thrown into sharp relief recently at my own employer, the Minister of Truth. We're a bit of a mutual admiration society and the mix is just right, a comfortable situation for both. I acknowledge his higher status and he acknowledges my expertise.

Trouble is with the drivers. They still retain the old Soviet notion that no man is higher than another and if they see half a chance to put themselves on a level with you, they take it. That's no problem for me because I love to chat with anyone.

What I didn't understand was that to "lower" yourself to that point over here loses you all respect with the more menial workers, who expect you to stay aloof. Result - one driver who started game playing and having jokes at my expense.

The matter was resolved quietly and he got the message but what he didn't get was that, irrespective of relative status, there's never any call to act disrepectfully, even to a political opponent. We need to accord the same attitude to a child of three as to a Prime Minister.

Just one man's point of view, of course.

Charlotte Bronte

[stylistica] not essential but adding spice

Spicing up your writing is not just a matter of learning or knowing these. They need to be "felt". This is a large and complicated field and only some are referred to below:

1. Imagery

a) metaphor: Substitution of one word for another

[Example: "the eye of heaven" for the sun]

b) simile: Explicit comparison

[Example: your eyes shine like the sun]

c) symbol: Concrete thing representing something abstract

[Example: the rose as a symbol of love; the cross as a symbol of Christian religion]

2. Devices that rely on the sound of the words

a) alliteration: Repetition of the first sound in two or more words

[Example: "A cold coming we had of it" T.S. Eliot; Journey of the Magi]

b) onomatopoeia: Sounds imitating the thing they refer to

[Example: The name cuckoo imitates the sound this bird makes]

3. Sentence construction

a) parallelism: The structure of successive sentences or phrases is the same

[Example: The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries. Winston Churchill]

b) anaphora: Obvious repetition of a word or phrase at the beginning of successive sentences.

[Example: " Though bladed corn be lodged and trees blown down, Though castles topple on their warders´ heads, Though palaces and pyramids do slope..." Shakespeare, Macbeth]

c) enumeration: A list of words, phrases or sub-clauses, usually employed to illustrate a comprehensive phrase or term by listing some of the elements it describes.

[Example: "I grant him bloody, luxurious, avaricious, false, deceitful..." Shakespeare, Macbeth]

The enumeration may be in climactic order.

[Example: " ... businessmen who have lived five, ten, twenty years in America..." W.A.Henry, Against a Confusion of Tongues]

4. Various other stylistic devices

a) direct address: The author speaks directly to his reader – this device can often be recognized by the second person pronoun "you". The appeal to the reader may occasionally be intensified by the use of the imperative in direct address.

b) rhetorical question: The author asks his reader a "question", the answer to which is perfectly clear anyway. So its function is not that of a real question – it is to lead or force the reader into agreeing with the author´s views.

c) quotation: The quotation of experts, of public figures or from other texts serves to support the author´s ideas and lend them a higher degree of acceptability. (Sometimes an author may quote an "expert" who is not actually a specialist in the field the author is dealing with – this is known in classical rhetoric as an "argumentum ad verecundiam".)

d) allusion: The author does not quote directly from some other text – instead, he uses ideas, concepts and references from well-known texts or historical events in the hope that an educated reader will recognize them and see them as support for the author´s own ideas. One of the most common allusions is the biblical reference.

e) repetition of key words: An important idea or concept may be stressed by its repetition. The fairly simple trick is that the reader cannot help but realize that something must be important if it is mentioned often enough.

f) personification: The author speaks to an object or an abstract idea as if it were a person.

5. Devices that rely on features of the layout

Two features which should be mentioned here are:

a) capitalization: The author may choose to write nouns that he considers very important with a capital letter at the beginning. He may even use only capital letters in writing a key word.

b) italics: Printing words, phrases or even complete sentences in italics is one of the simplest and most effective ways of showing that they are important.

6. Two other specific devices

Zeugma is a device in which a verb or other part of speech is appropriate to a following word or phrase but is then also applied to a second (or even third) word or phrase, not strictly correctly but acceptably.

eg. She raised the blinds and [lifted] my spirits.

Syllepsis is like zeugma but the verb is used in a different way from the first to the second following word or phrase. This results in a humorous effect.

eg. He leaned heavily on the podium and stale jokes.

[feminism] a fine answer to a supposed detractor

Welshcakes has answered my posts on radicalism:

First of all, let us remember that throughout history, there would have been no change without those who were willing to be strident, to break the law for what they believed in and even to risk their lives for it.

In the following paragraph, if you take out the word "feminism", which claims the credit for women's advances and substitute the word "women" for the people who actually achieved it, then I agree that:

[Feminism], in winning the freedoms and rights that women in western countries now enjoy, was and is a necessary movement, for once freedoms have been won, they have to be protected.

Welshcakes, of course, correctly observes:

Where it all goes wrong, I believe, is when we say, “Ok, we’ve got those so now let’s get more rights and freedoms than men have.” I have never, for instance, gone along with the “wages for housework” idea for none of its proponents ever stopped to consider that single women have to do it as well, and certainly nobody was going to reward us.

This was my point all along. It was radicalism, not feminism, which I was attacking but feminists might tend to overlook that. The next part, strangely, I cannot agree with:

And, however “hard” running a home might be, it cannot, just cannot, be compared with competing in the ruthless, target-setting environment that is the world of work today.

I'm in this "ruthless, target-setting environment" now and I also have to run the home and of the two, I feel the latter is far harder, especially when there is a family. Welshcakes is an adept - just look at her productions - so she might feel the former is harder.

It's a lovely post and argues the case for feminism very well. The feminist lobby could do worse than to snap up her text, as JMB is doing and use it as a bulwark against the sorts of incursions I've seemingly been trying to make.

If you haven't already read it, here it is again.