[rape] seven short posts on the matter [6]

The way it should be

Seems to me the answer is to immediately differentiate, as Germaine Greer indicated, between types of rape:

1] the unprovoked attack on a modestly clad female in a place which in no way could be construed as conducive to this crime;
2] underage statutory rape;
3] incest where, though she might be of age, she’s still in a subordinate position;
4] where the wife or consensual partner, of age, brings the charge, with a history of conjugal relations and alcohol and/or a prior history of violence is involved;
5] the unprovoked attack on a female in a place which could be construed as conducive to the crime, where she demonstrably was dressed enticingly or can be shown to have repetitively placed herself in a position which could well bring her into contact with such types;
6] attacks, particularly group, where the female was for some time in their company, where she left the point of meeting with them and where her attire and overheard conversation was of a sexual nature;
7] where the wife or consensual partner, of age, brings the charge, despite a history of conjugal relations and no alcohol or prior history of violence is involved;
8] where her trade is sex.

The criterion is still that she claims she said “no” but it’s filtered through the above hierarchy of situations. This would take care of the professional rape-caller who’s out to make a dollar.

Which leaves the girl who’s really been raped but is too traumatized to press charges. This, it seems to me, is the situation we should be directing our energies towards. I knew such a girl once.

[rape] seven short posts on the matter [5]

The way it should be

Doesn’t the definition of rape come down, in the end, to not wanting him [and it is always him] to do it?

Do what? Where’s the line? Is the line the first touch? Is it the kiss? Is it the first time the hand touches a sensitive part? The woman wants the right to say “no” at any moment in the process and wants the weight of the law available to bring down on any transgressor.

Women rely on legislation but no amount of legislation alters the fact that man’s physiognomy is such that once he’s aroused, it needs release. She may not like that but it’s how men are biologically structured. What she has no clue about is how strong that desire is, even in reasonable, quiet men. And they’re not the ones she’s dirty-talking with in a bar or club. That desire is overpowering and a man need never apologize for that.

Alison says: "Yes women need to take care of themselves, of each other when they are drinking, [or not], only a fool would think differently. But a change in attitude needs to take place on both sides ..."

I agree with the point but add that they should never have been in that position in the first place. This smacks too much of wanting to have your cake and eat it too.

There was a time where a thing called “chaperoning” went on and there was a lot of sense in it. The girl always had protection because she is naïve and doesn’t understand the male dynamic, no matter how worldly she might think she is.

But we threw all that out, didn’t we? Along with the Christian moral code which really did rein in man’s excesses in most cases and treated women as ladies. Anyone over a certain age knows that to be true, knows how society was. Even the statistics on rape support it. But people don’t want to concede that. They see this as an argument to put women back in the kitchen.

I say it’s just common sense – the more that unchaperoned girls freely drug around all night with absolutely no parental control, the more this sort of thing is going to happen. But parents refuse to admit any responsibility in this. They say it’s the type of animal now roaming around, raping girls. Nothing to do with them, the parents.

As for the aggressive male predator, the epidemic of porn and gaming on the web does affect their already jaundiced view of the female – have you seen some of those games? The porn of course you’ve already seen. We’re force fed it.

All of which does not take into account the unprovoked attack on an innocent woman.

[rape] seven short posts on the matter [4]

The way it should be

Vox Day who, like me, detests feminism and the PC mafia, says this about rape:

I think that the penalty for knowingly bringing a false charge against someone should be the same as the false charge brings. Although of course in Cool Britannia these days, it's entirely possible that two years in jail is the maximum penalty for rape.

One of his commenters says:

Rape is rape, no matter who the victim is. The degree of damage done though probably depends on the victim. Consider three cases:

1. Virgin

2. Faithful wife

3. 6-john a day prostitute

Another commenter says that we run the risk of a society of Prenuptial Contracts, where love and romance are the last things on anyone’s mind.

Germaine Greer thinks that date rape and one-on-one rape should be legally separate.

Ian Grey points to a Times article debunking the female case.

I still think it all comes down to neither side understanding the other’s biology.

[rape] seven short posts on the matter [3]

The way it should be

Mike Tyson saw Desiree Washington in a line. That’s as he would have liked it, all the girls lined up for his inspection. He chose her and from the field, I would have too. He was a known lecher, a brute, everything he’d done and said indicated that:

"A lot of young women don't know what they're getting themselves into. A lot of them think it's fun, a game. . . . But they truly don't know what they're into when they lock themselves into a room and engage in sex with a man who knows how to handle a woman."

She went up to his room later, flattered and curious. He says that, by crossing that threshold, it was permission. She said it was not – that she was a naïve girl, summoned by her hero to talk about things. Did she honestly believe, in that society and at her age, that it was to play tiddlywinks and chat about philosophy?

She might have. I’ve known many seemingly worldly women who were still easy to con, who were the product of their relatively sheltered upbringing, despite later developments.

The perpetual hunger to be beautiful and that thirst to be loved which is the real curse of Eve. [Jean Rhys, the Left Bank, 1927]

There’s the rub. Naïvety and the desire to be wanted but how many times, once it’s clear he wants her, does she see the matter as closed, that in his mind the ultimate denouement of the libidinous dance is a simple inevitability but in hers, she’s already thinking thoughts of other things. She’d be shocked if he kept pressing his attentions.

The way the woman thinks. The way the man reacts. It’s patently obvious that a woman cannot understand the way a man’s biology works. And a man never really understands that for a woman, desire is a tool.

[rape] seven short posts on the matter [2]

The way it should be

I’ve tried to feel, to empathize with women countless times. Surrounded by girls most days, it’s a fertile field for finding out how a woman thinks and feels. I’ve painstakingly asked my partner what it’s like to have a baby inside her, what it’s like to give birth. All the joy, pain, strange emotions, the lot. I want to know.

Desperately keeping a tight hold on my sharp tongue, I listen to what it is to be a woman – hopes, dreams, ideas, what she respects, what she disparages. I want to know. From all this, it’s more than clear that rape is an incredibly destructive violation, not only of the body but of what the person is, of everything she or he has achieved. Gone in a moment.

I have to get some clue as to what this means. So I think of prison. There I am, in a cell and three beefy types come in, hold me down and do it. I can now feel the shame, the anguish, the burning anger, the desire for revenge. Perhaps the revenge is more masculine, I don’t know. Plus the sweaty smell of them. It’s bad.

We were once burgled – the back window had been forced open and the bedroom had been trashed. All our personal items were scattered and the valuables taken. My rarest vinyl records had been taken.

Perhaps that too was a little like rape. A sense of powerlessness as they do as they wish.

[rape] seven short posts on the matter [1]

The way it should be

I’m a rapist.

I know this because a piece of graffiti in 1985 on a brick wall, in two foot high letters, told me: “All men are rapists.” Marilyn French, in 1977, also told me this in a book and she added: “They rape us with their eyes, their laws and their codes.” Of course, that was before the PC mafia took over.

There’s a third reason I know I’m a rapist. My own partner told me so. The night before, we’d both been as hard at it as each other - plus romance. This night, we’d also both been as hard at it as each other, with one difference. She had said at the start she wasn’t in the mood but of course, all that changed later. There was still the romance.

Next morning, she calmly informed me I’d raped her, didn’t I know? I could go to jail for that, didn’t I know? I think my look of shock, rather than disbelief, might have saved me on that occasion. Interestingly, one afternoon, with me laid up with flu and at death’s door, [must lay it on with a trowel here], she raped me.

She entered our bedroom and there was no doubt what was on the agenda. I protested: “In a few days. Let me get better.” But it was not to be. For the first ten minutes, I was raped but it’s amazing how one’s physiognomy can find energy from nowhere, don’t you think? During the coffee break, I told her she’d raped me. She thought I was recovering, as my sense of humour had returned.

By the way, her work was at the Family Law Court.