Gratuitous nudity for a Wednesday morning – wonder why they had to be naked to have a quarrel.Which of us have not, at some time, wished to have a classic Shakespearean jibe at the ready to hurl, like a thunderbolt, at the unsuspecting offender? Now you can – here are the first ten in an ongoing series of wonderful taunts:
1] Thou gorbellied reeling-ripe clotpole!
2] Thou puny elf-skinned strumpet!
3] Thou reeky clapper-clawed gudgeon!
4] Thou fawning tardy-gaited joithead!
5] Thou bootless fat-kidneyed skainsmate!
6] Thou mammering spur-galled codpiece!
7] Thou mangled unwash'd clack-dish!
8] Thou droning full-gorged apple-john!
9] Thou dankish rump-fed jolt-head!
10] Thou warped dismal-dreaming foot-licker!
Hey if you want Shakespearian insults go and look up Queen Margerate's speech in Richard III I think she calls him a toad at one point and several other things- the wonderfully witty thing is that just ass she is finishing her curse- Richard interrupts it with her own name and thus she curses herself with all the epithets. Its well worth a read!
ReplyDeleteMost impressed by Thou reeky clapper-clawed gudgeon!
ReplyDeleteUKDP: I love N7 and there's a whole page of them still to come [the next with references as to where they can be found.
ReplyDeleteTiberius: Queen Margerate's speech in Richard III. Yes, this is cooly ruly.
Things not to say to a drunken Scotman at closing time.
ReplyDeleteYou starvelling, you eel-skin, you dried neat's-tongue, you bull's-pizzle, you stock-fish--O for breath to utter what is like thee!-you tailor's-yard, you sheath, you bow-case, you vile standing tuck!
Taken from: Henry IV, part I
If you google "shakesperean insult generator", you can have a new one at the click of the mouse.
A clot-pole.
ReplyDeleteIsn't that a tad offensive to our friends from Eastern Europe?