Saturday, April 05, 2008

[duet dudes] see them at cherie's

[st george] stirring himself for april 23rd


Wonko points out:

When the Conservatives took control of Telford & Wrekin Council they replaced the flag of the EU with the English flag. I hope they take advantage of the new relaxed flag flying rules to remove the British flag and replace it with our own national flag, the Cross of St George.

April 23rd coming up, folks. Don't forget it. The dragon will be festooned with his coat of blue and 12 stars in a circle.

[phonetic dictionary] second offerings

The idea is that this is only a phonetic dictionary and so the definitions do not actually accord with the meaning of the words but with the parts of the words, as sounded.

So, take "antelope", definition "absconding insect". "Ant" - the little insect. "Elope" - to run away with one's lover.

Similarly, with "badinage" - the phonetic meaning comes out as "bad in age" - memory, sex, teeth.

If you get the idea, try these below:


The first offerings were here.

Here are the second:
3 Adenoid..................Irritated by adverts

4 Alimony..................Arab coins


7 Aphrodisiac............Trapeze artists from Zaire


9 Barbecue................Awaiting haircut


12 Capsize................Seven and three-quarters


13 Carrion......................Continue


14 Castanet....................Go fishing


15 Chinchilla...................Aftershave


17 Counter-culture.........Retailing


19 Emulate.....................Dead bird
Can you state, in each case, why that particular phonetic meaning?

Friday, April 04, 2008

[thought for the day] friday evening

There's only one way to find out if a man is honest...ask him.

If he says 'yes,' you know he's a crook.

[Groucho]

[making eyes] to look or not to look, that is ...

Was having a little "discussion" with a sweet girl this morning [hesitate to call it an "argument'] and she was saying how she hated how men always make eyes, the arrogant bstds [last three words my addition].

I countered by saying that that was rich and recounted an incident three evenings ago when I was in the cafe and a guy and his girl came in. She positioned herself where she could check out the cafe and while he was forking some spaghetti into his mouth, the first cross-room shot was fired.

I naturally returned it and it might have continued except that that chap could have been me, poor sod.

My fellow discussee pointed out that this made me as bad as all the others, at which point I said hmmm, well I don't look at them - they look at me.

She asked how I knew they were looking at me if I hadn't been looking to see if they were looking at me? And why would they be looking at me anyway? I replied that it might be my white scarf and balding pate.

At that point, fortuitously, the car arrived and I got away.

On reflection in the car, I was sure I didn't make eyes at girls but definitely know when they look at me, at which point I usually look back. How would I know? Well it's easy to see movement through 180 degrees or more - surely you can do that too? So a face turned towards you would be obvious, even if you weren't looking.

No matter.

I decided this evening to put it to some controlled tests, involving walking to the Pyramid and trying various moves along the way.

1. First was to see how it normally worked and I was going to scrutinize and analyse everything. The controlling premise was that it had to be a girl with a bf.

All right, along came the first and an interesting thing happened.


At about ten metres, he was oblivious but she had already seen what was coming. It might have been my white scarf, it might have been my balding pate. Either way, within two metres, all three making moves to step aside to pass, he, being closest to me and taller, never got to see what she was doing.

She initially dropped the chin and eyes but then, at one metre, the look was shot across, her face half hidden by the bf's arm. I suddenly looked and she looked away quickly but as we passed, the 2nd look came from the side.

He was still oblivious to the whole thing.

2. This time I showed absolutely no interest [but don't forget the 180 degree vision]. I stared straight ahead and let them pass and there was the dropped head half hidden behind the bf and one quick look but then she ceased looking.

3. The third was a slap in the face for me as she showed not the least interest and resolutely looked ahead, gripping the bf's arm.

4. The fourth was like the first except that, instead of returning her look, I let a slight grin play on my lips. She didn't give me a second look.

5. The fifth was more dangerous as I telegraphed the move early and glanced in full view of the bf. He began his predictable body language, she dropped her head and then shot the look but he looked at her and she covered it well. Phew. Then again, he'd clearly summed up that the opposition wasn't much and didn't bother with me as we passed.

6. The sixth was at the traffic lights - they were across the road. I didn't look once. She looked the whole time, even as we passed. It might have been my white pate or balding scarf.

7. I never tried where I'd make eyes at her [wanting to keep the high moral ground with my afrementioned discussee] but I surmise the gf would have looked straight ahead and ignored this sleazy jerk.

So what did it prove?

That everyone at least notices what goes on around, that the second or continued look is really the only one you could take issue with, that you get more looks if you don't seem to look and maybe that men should be more aware of their gf's relative position next time they go for a walk with her.

Also - never make eyes at a girl with a large bf.

[tales from the regions] more of the same



H/T Wonko:

A regional "senate" of local council leaders could oversee Advantage West Midlands spending, under plans unveiled by the Government.

The region’s top local government figures, including the leaders of councils such as Birmingham, Wolverhampton, Coventry, Dudley, Walsall and Sandwell, will meet together to oversee spending of more than £300 million.

Am I out of order seeing this scramble for the Eurodollar as obscene? And while we're loosely on the topic of local decisions - how about the new eco-towns on green areas, brought to our attention by Englisch Fyrd:

Mr Shapps said the Conservatives would "always back plans for sustainable eco-communities. But I'm afraid there are several on this list which will cause immediate concern to local people because they're being built on green fields," he added.

... along with the loss of part of Norfolk Broads?

Ron Whitehead of the Flood Protection Association, an industry body, said: "I know of developers who get approval and do as little as possible to comply. There needs to be a performance specification for flood defence - if you have the possibility of this type of flooding you have the following measures.

"Unless the Government closes the loophole, developers will continue to get away with it. If there were building standards, developers would have to take account of flood risk when properties were refurbished, too."


Great to see that planning for what was once England is in such good, selfless hands.

[phonetic dictionary] first offerings

Long, long ago I tried this with readers but it went down like a lead balloon. Think I'll try again. If it's popular, there are plenty more of them waiting to post.

The idea is that it is a phonetic dictionary and so the definitions do not accord with the meanng of the words but with the parts of the words, as sounded. Try these:


6 Antelope................Absconding insect

8 Badinage................Memory, sex, teeth

11 Canteloupe...........Chaperoned

13 Carrion......................Continue

16 Condescending..........Greek Paratrooper

18.Divest........................Princess's garment

23 Felonious..................Monk

36 Ideal..........................You shuffle

63 Scintillate..................Nocturnal orgy

68 Surcingle...................Unmarried baronet

One reader has just asked about this post and so I'd best take one of them and dissect it. Antelope - OK, it's an animal. But ant [the pictured insect] ... and he elopes with his girlfriend ... well, the image tickles the fancy. Same with "sin till late". [Chuckle - well I like them anyway.]

[[raf birthday] it took an american to remember it

[crucible of character] when the ship goes down

“The ship must sail on... regardless of who the captain is, regardless of who the admiral is...”

One should never try to plumb the depths of the Pungeoning for meaning but take the theme for what it is and admire the accompanying graphic work.

This one today is more accessible for us lower ranks - the notion of the ship [state department, commercial organization, arts council or whatever] suffering a series of flawed heads and slowly sinking to oblivion.

It was changes in the Admiralty that led not to mutiny, but desertion by 90% of the crew. The Resbo’s remaining days were helmed by a procession of impotent captains, Queeg-like but without the experience. Needless to say, the lingering skeleton crew had clung to the gunwales, the seas growing fiercer with each successive voyage.

But the end is always inevitable:

EPILOGUE: All of the original crew, and finally Merbos, did eventually jump ship, as one must when fatal leaks and other Benny Suggs go unacknowledged by brass. The Resbo continued to limp along with clueless crews, captains in name only, and admirals who abandoned them to the wind. She was lost at sea about a year later.

This has happened three times with me and one has to wonder how far I contributed to the demise though in subordinate capacity. Certainly I jumped ship on all three occasions. The latest one was by accompanying the Admiral of the time to his new abode, from where we could gaze across and observe the foundering of the old ship under the incompetent newbie, Mr. Arrogance.

I'll say the exact number - 63 - 63 crew departed voluntarily [from 84] , investment then channelled itself through the new agency with its brass and glass penthouse welcome and the old ship, which can never officially sink, still limps along in name only.

Speaking to the Admiral, I asked if he felt vindicated or regretted what had happened. Oh regretted, to be sure. All those years building it up to the point where Europe was visiting - all now gone.

Yes, regret to be sure.


Thursday, April 03, 2008

[thought for the day] thursday evening

There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation. [WC Fields]