Monday, July 30, 2007

[british airways] classic rant source

One of the best rants of all time? Don't give a thought to the layout and occasional typos, as Guthrum was clearly angry:

And a big thank you to British Airways

Do not, repeat, do not patronise me with your 'safety' demonstrations. Let me tell you my friends, that the survival rate will be low in the case of an emergency, because you have crammed people in so tight, that even a little lad like me has difficulty getting IN to my seat, let alone getting out in a fire,forced landing, ditching situation.. The evacuation will be in order of the survival of the fittest as you bloody well know.

Oh I can personally feel every part of this as he writes. He continues:

I would also like to extend my thanks to the ignorant Afrikaaner in front of me who at every opportunity put his seat back during the laughingly [named] 'meal times' when his maw consumed the meagre fare in two seconds, despite my very English protests of I say, do you mind' (in reality it was for fcuk sake will you pack it in) he finally got the message, but I have found it does take time for new ideas with his kind of volk.

I would also like to thank Mr & Mrs English Bucket and spade for their incessant whinging (loud sotto voce of course) Stay at home dears and go to Margate, you know it makes sense!

Finally to the git opposite me with a cold, but at forty eight has not learned the rudiments of put you hand over your mouth when you have a bad cold and sneezing over a radius of five rows and me is not socially or medically acceptable. You selfish bastard !

Here's something a bit nicer about BA. Poor Tim Lancaster.

5 comments:

Welshcakes Limoncello said...

What a brilliant rant!

lady macleod said...

good bit about the bombs. I am always up for a good kaboom.

LOL at the rant on BA! Too too funny.

jmb said...

All this flying stuff is depressing me no end. After the three hour required wait beforehand, assuming the plane is not late then add on that time, the discomfort of the actual flight and the possibility of crashing etc, you are making me think I should stay home. When is teleporting coming to First Life?
jmb

Miss Smack said...

Hilarious post!

Daimyo Higham-Baka-Ohta said...

Yes, the old Guthrum is pretty good when he gets going.