Wednesday, December 20, 2006

[festive season] looking rationally at this thing

I’ve already posted twice on Christmas and New Year here and here but I was hardly expecting the peerless Doctor Vee to come out with similar sentiments on this enforced enjoyment. As Duncan says:

...Except that people don’t enjoy themselves at Christmas time. They just get totally stressed out. That’s what I hate about Christmas. It’s not Christmas itself. It’s the whole fuss that surrounds it. It completely misses the point for me, which is to cheer yourself up during the winter. Ideally, the run-up to Christmas would last for a week, rather than three months. I haven’t even started any of my Christmas shopping yet — mostly because I haven’t had the time. Most Christmas traditions completely pass me by.

But now I am faced with a dilemma. Colleagues have been giving me Christmas cards. It must be at least four years since I personally received a Christmas card. For me, exchanging Christmas cards is one of the most insincere things that people do at this time of year, and that really is saying something.

I mean, I never receive Christmas cards from my friends, and I never give them cards either. Does that mean I wish them a rubbish Christmas? Of course it doesn’t. It just means I’m not wasting as much paper. I can just wish people a Merry Christmas anyway. Why give them a card? Often the process of gift-giving is completely avoided as well. Two of my friends ceremoniously exchange five pound notes every year...

Please don't get me wrong. It's not the bonhommie, the coming together of family and the pleasure that brings I'm so down on. I hope it's wonderful that way for you. No, it's the way commercialism has hijacked the time of year and the way people seem to take leave of their senses in wanting to force you to do the same.

There's one other aspect. Having lost my last remaining family member this August and having only one lady companion to call family, there's not a lot for me and I'm sure, for many others, to celebrate at this time. I by no means begrudge you your joyous hearth but all it does for me is make me feel loneliness and longing for those who have gone.

My blogheader is my way of saying to you all: “Merry Christmas and Happy New Year and may love abound at your hearthplace.”

6 comments:

  1. James, Christmas is a lonely time for many people for the same reason, they really dread it because the expectations are so high, people feel they are expected to be happy.

    I must say I love it, but then I have a family and that makes a difference. I can appreciate it won't be like that for you.

    You have a very happy Christmas too.

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  2. James I understand your sentiments entirely- I also dislike the forced jollity of it all, what if I'm just feeling anti-social and a bit of a grumpy basterd on Christmas Day. Personally I much prefer spontaneous affection than affection that I know a year in advance is coming. But I hope you have a happy Christmas and I'm sorry you don't have anyone to spend it with. Watch some good films etc.

    If that post didn't make sense, I'm tired.

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  3. Thank you both. Yes, Tiberius, I can tell you're tired. This is another reason not to do it now but at the orthodox time of January 7th.

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  4. James, I really do empathise. After my Mum died [and I have no other immediate family, either, except, of course, Simi the dog who was just looking at me aghast!] I didn't want to bother or send cards for a long time either. But now I figure I was brought up by 2 wonderful people and it would be a kind of betrayal of all the lovely Xmases they gave me not to celebrate now. When you are single, though, you can feel awfully left out at this season; in the UK I used to feel guilty because I was not stressed with cooking the turkey and all that and women's magazines with their stupid "countdowns to a perfect Xmas" used to make me want to die. You are not alone, dear James...

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  5. Amen, Welshcakes. Happy Christmas James, and rest easy in the knowledge that BlogPower is one of the toppest ideas of 2006 - and it was yours!

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